This Guild Is Batty!

This Guild Is Batty! thumbnail

Invitation in hand, it’s time for Eve and friends to travel north in search of the legendary Dragonwrought. With a single-minded focus, they’ll trek deep into the mountains, willfully ignoring the onslaught of side quests threatening to derail their journey.

The only things anybody knows about the illusive Dragonwrought, greatest of all the adventuring companies in Leshk, are their deep connections to the dragons that roam the skies beyond their keep, and that they haven’t deemed take a new recruit in decades.

But nobody’s sure exactly how many decades.

Whatever awaits Eve at her new guild, there’s certain to be plenty of foot elementals, lungeons, and other patently ridiculous challenges to overcome and rewards to reap – assuming anyone can figure out what a lungeon even is.

This Class Is Bonkers!

This Class Is Bonkers! thumbnail

With the way behind them sealed, the only way forward for Eve and her friends is down. Down the narrow steps carved into the mountain. Down into the oppressive toxic fog. Down into the Dead Fields. 

But the Dead Fields are not so dead as they seem. Things lurk in the mist, things far beyond the levels of Eve, Wes, Preston, and, especially, the hatchling Reginald. But Eve doesn’t care. Sure, every darting shadow and every roar in the distance sends a chill up her spine, but just as any passing beast could prove the one threat she can’t overcome, so, too, could it prove a windfall of valuable exp. Eve likes exp. 

Before the party can make their way past the deadly trellac, before they can return to civilization, before they can make their mark on this world with the power of friendship, overwhelming violence, and mediocre puns, they’ll need to pick up a few levels. 

Eve and the gang are trapped in the Dead Fields, and they’re going to have to grind their way out.

This Quest Is Broken!

This Quest Is Broken! thumbnail

The Questing Stones have come to Nowherested, and Evelia Greene is finally ready to receive her life’s quest. Perhaps she’ll be a great warrior, or a wealthy merchant, or a brilliant mage. Perhaps her quest is simply to live a quiet life, constantly honing a craft to the heights of perfection. 

Or perhaps the Questing Stones will grant her the legendary mission of popping over to the next village to pick up a loaf of bread. 

Wouldn’t that be ridiculous? 

Eve can’t even begin to guess how or why she’s come by such an absurd life goal, nor how a level-one messenger girl is supposed to complete anything labeled as legendary, but at least she can be sure of one thing. No matter how many wolves or goblins attack, no matter how many speeding tickets she racks up, no matter how many bakeries spontaneously combust as she steps into town, one way or another, Eve is going to get that goddamned bread. 

There just might be a few side quests along the way. 

This book contains game elements, good jokes, bad jokes, worse jokes, and language strong enough to lift weights. Please enjoy.